Why Focus on Fathers? Because All Dads Matter

There is something amazing happening for fathers today! Have you noticed how men have a wonderful new permission to express themselves as fathers? Have you noticed how many have been so open about their deep love and caring for their children? Have you noticed how open so many men have been in their struggles and challenges in being the best fathers they can be? It is an amazing new conversation that we believe fathers have wanted permission to have for decades. We have raised the bar as a result. We have also increased the expectations for fathers and so it is our commitment to be a positive part of helping men meet those expectations and having compassion for them when they don’t.

We don’t need research to prove why it is important for fathers to be involved in their children’s lives. It is a given. The fact that there is even dialogue about it, or research required to prove a father’s importance is the exact evidence of how lost our society is when it comes to understanding the critical role of fathers. We know the truth: All Dads Matter. 

While our society has a lot of great things to say about fathers these days and loves the photo-ops and the narratives that permeate our media, there is a shadow side to it all. Primarily, the systemic biases against fathers are significant. These biases are present in the way courts are still deciding cases for moms and against dads almost by default. There is also the lack of funding and policies focused on supporting fathers. Look in most places and you will still see the ways that various programs and individuals talk about moms and exclude dads, unintentionally, but reinforcing the idea that moms are the most important parent. Mom is the default. Dad is the add-on. And we wonder why some Dads feel like they don’t matter. And then it isn’t too long before they act like they don’t matter! But we know the truth: All Dads Matter. 

Many dads don’t have the tools they need to truly be the fathers they want to be. We make a lot of mistakes. We may repeat some of our own fathers’ mistakes. But we must celebrate fathers. We know that our fathers were imperfect. We come to embrace our own imperfections in community with  others, not in isolation and in shame. We seek help as we commit to being the very best fathers we can be even when our fathers may not have been able to do the same. We commit to being a part of the solution and never giving up no matter how hard it gets. We know the truth: All Dads Matter. 

* The title for this page comes from a wonderful program in Merced County, CA called “All Dads Matter.”